Warp-Speed Requiem

I’m inept.

Well, not skilled, at least. A few years ago, a friend who was in law school told me her opinion: that the higher you move in the realm of academic knowledge, the more common sense you lose. At last reading, mine should be functioning at about 50%. The forward shields took a beating with that last academic encounter, and we’re diverting all the extra power to impulse engines to keep from socially drifting. In order to keep power to life support as well, non-essential functions had to be shut down temporarily.

And, with it, common sense in the realm of interpersonal relationships.

Now, people tell I’m cranky. They chuckle a lot and shake their heads as if to say, “Oh, that’s just Dave.” In fact, they usually tell me that I’m like House, and they’re not really joking. Except, its just when I’m around groups of people. Alone, I’m a lot more like Monk.

It bothers me the most when I realize I’ve done it to family. I miss obvious gestures from my father-in-law that are invitations to build a relationship. I inadvertently speak to my parents in a way that sounds condescending.

To make me feel better, I’m labeled as an “introvert,” or told that I “do better one-on-one.” In my defense, part of this has to do with the fact that I’m a Northerner that has been transplanted to the South, where politeness and social expectations are of a decidedly different flavor. At the end of the day, though, be it due to academia or whatever other reason, my social common sense has died, and this is its requiem. Or, perhaps its just malfunctioning, and in need of repair along with the other systems.

I’ll let you know after the overhaul. Hopefully, the ship will be repaired soon, and able to jump back to hyperspace.


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