I have this problem…when I get stressed, my mouth runs.
It’s a completely innocent motivation, don’t get me wrong. When my stress-o-meter reaches the red, I just need to verbalize what’s on my mind in order to release the pressure. Then I’m fine. I tend to exaggerate when I’m verbalizing, and I tend to do it in a grumbling manner.
Translation: I complain for ten minutes, and then I’m ready to deal with life again.
Unfortunately, my fiance doesn’t deal with that. When I “discuss” all of the things that makes me so upset, she goes into this thought process where she wants to fix all of it. When it’s something that she’s already been dealing with, she feels like I’m calling her a failure. You can imagine the cycle this leads to: I verbalize my feelings to let off the pressure, and then I’m happy and ready to move on, only to find out that she’s depressed, irritated, and suddenly has issues that she needs to address. Which are the same issues that I just vented. Which are now being heaped back on me, which means I will need to verbalize them again….
I’d love to say that women are complicated here, but I think it’s different than that. I think that men and women function very simply and effectively on their own. It’s when we try to entertwine two lives and live them as one that things get really complicated. Of course that’s one of our primary goals…to find someone to entertwine our lives with, right? God sort of hard-wired most of us that way.
So He wants the complicated stuff to replace the effective simplicity in human dynamics.
God definitely has a sense of humor.